Responses to previous post
Hello lovely QgQ followers!
There was an overwhelming response to the previous post about body image. Hundreds of you responded with very positive feedback, but we also received a small handful of negative reactions from women who are thin or small and felt that the “skinny model” didn’t accurately represent them. There have also been a flurry of comments along the lines of comparing ourselves and our sizes to the bodies presented in this image. I am very excited that so much thought and feeling was stirred up, which is the point of any posting in my mind. Because of this I feel compelled to respond with my own thoughts.
1. The models in this image are still models, even if most of them are considered “plus size.” In my mind a model can never truly reflect what is “normal,” because there is still a very narrow definition of beauty being presented, which I think inherently does a disservice to women. These women are all white, high-femme, and subscribe to a very culturally normative beauty standard which in no way represent the diversity of beauty in size, shape, color, and style that exists in the world.
2. I think it is problematic to have such over-generalized categories such as “men’s ideal” and “women’s ideal.” I’m sure there is some statistical research behind these labels, but it’s painting with such broad strokes that I’m not sure how accurate it is. There is also an inherent hetero-bias in my mind, with the implication that the male gaze is what all women strive to please.
3. Despite these problems, I still chose to post this because I think it is a powerful reminder of how arbitrary size is as a measure of beauty. It is refreshing to see bigger women portrayed as beautiful, because we’re so saturated with images of very thin women being the only option for beauty and sexiness. I don’t see that there is any negative implication for thin women, the smallest woman is also beautiful and positively portrayed. It’s just a reminder that there is more than one option. The power of this image for me is to remind us that what is “average,” and what women believe is “ideal” is so very different. And that is sad because it leads to so much unhappiness, despair, and a desire to be something other than what we are.
My favorite thing about this image is the quote “a body is meant to be seen, not all covered up.” That’s the take-home message for me. How can we step outside of the numbers, comparisons, self-criticism and desire to be different, and find respect for everything our bodies are? How has your body served you? How has it treated you well? What has it given you? How can you start feeling that your body is part of who you are, not something foreign to be punished or changed? Regardless of which of these women most closely resembles us, how can we try to shift our attention from what we think we should look like, and begin focusing on getting to know who we actually are?
These, queer girls, are my questions. Thank you as always for creating such a lively and positive community to ponder these things together.
